I wrote Tuesday after some stressful days. I was getting more zen and picking myself back up, but I think it is important to write about days when you cry while vacuuming. It brings days like today in sharp and happy relief.
First bit of happy came when I read this article. It doesn’t make the horror of what happened go away, but it does show us human can be good and do the right thing when things are dire. Life sucks sometimes. Some times it is down right torturous. I have to believe things like this article help us get through it.
The biggest bit of happy came when I met The Viking’s Tina. I keep telling myself that I won’t discuss our relationship here often. Sometimes I lie to me but totally on accident. His Tina is good good people. I enjoyed his sort of awkward out there humor. Also, I didn’t think it was possible, but I am even more in love with The Viking. I am stupid, big-eyed, crazy in love with him. He is a good, kind, smart, funny man. I’m pretty lucky.
My Tina entered a photography contest with a big photographers site. I’m so proud of her. Putting yourself out there for judgement and rejection is hard, but she did it. She has something I can’t identify that makes her photography outstanding. I’m pretty sure I would think so even if she weren’t my best friend. I do think I need some more pictures though.
Then I found this:
It is people risking themselves to save some bear cubs. How can that not make for the happy?
Oh, and I got a great hair cut that managed to even make my terrible dye job look cool.
So, you know how I repeatedly say happiness is a choice? It is. Sometimes it is a struggle. The past two days have SUCKED. I am neither willing or able to go into why. I am just summing it up with douche bags be douching. Except the Viking, he is coming out of this like a gorramn rock star. (Also, I dyed my hair. Mistakes where made, and while I normally hate to point fingers: I blame velociraptors and Scientology.)
This is an awesome bit of happy for the list.
Yesterday, early in the day, I was so happy I could barely contain my happy. As the evening progressed, the douches douched. I tried to stay happy. This morning there was more waves of asshattery. I gave up and cried while I vacuumed my floor. Crying while vacuuming the floor feels really pathetic, but I admit I did it.
Then I took a deep breath and tried to fix what I could. Life is not fair. People with fuck with your happy, most of the time without malice, and make it a struggle. You deal with what you can. Sometimes you can’t just he-man your way through it. Sometimes you gotta cry while you vacuum.
I can’t make people be nice or fair or not assholes. Sometimes I can’t let them not get to me. Anyone who says that they never let people get to them are liars or heavily medicated, or both. There are times I consider picking up wine drinking as a hobby. I’m human, this is what we do. I’m going to go ahead and say it is okay that I cried while chasing the dust bunnies. I decided to try again. I think that’s what counts.
This man deserves a cookie or something. It is flipping adorable.
So, as said last blog, I’m going to make an effort to post things that make me crazy happy and fill me with hope for humans. This isn’t my real Saturday post, just an addition to the List of Happy.
When I was a tiny thing I escaped while my mom was distracted and started to cross the street. (Mommy sharks, reserve your judgement. This was over 20 years ago, and it is something that could have happened to anyone. Try being empathetic instead of judgmental.) Some young guy had stopped traffic to get me to safety. These things matter.