Majestic!

First a picture:

That's right bitches

I am still a little doped up on cold medicine. I would like to pretend that the medicine is the reason for my lack of coherency but the truth is my brain is the reason for my lack of coherency.

I have noticed that a lot of my stories start out with the same few openers like ‘I was at the super wal-mart’ or ‘When I was at Tina’s house.’ (Right now I really want to make a ‘one time, at band camp’ joke.) I think my strangest stories start out with ‘I was really hyper’ or ‘I was laying in bed trying to fall asleep.’ I have another one of those stories for you. Also, why don’t real grown-ups get hyper? I don’t want to be a real grown up if I am no longer allowed to get hyper. Anyway, I digress.

Yesterday, I had an hour long phone conversation with Tina. I asked her how she liked her new Kindle Fire and she got all excited and talked for like 20 minutes about how awesome it is. It got me thinking about how odd people are about technology.

We have our pet technologies. Tina is fairly indifferent to her computer. If it isn’t photoshop, whatever video game she is into at that moment, or online shopping, she could care less. She can take pictures and do magic and make them look incredible or she can find the strangest, most obscure things to buy, but she shrugs off everything else.

Me: When was the last time you defragged your computer?

Tina:  Blue?

The woman loves her smart phone and her Kindle. She knows all this little, bitty, nitty details and can explain to you everything they are capable of doing. I am expecting her to call me any day now and tell me she wrote a program that synced her smart phone, her kindle, the atomic clock in Colorado, and CERN’s Hadron Collider and it makes toast all while she is reading everything cool on the internet. On that day, I will still be making phone calls on my rotary cell phone and reading paper books because I am just not that cool.

The fourth book in the A Song of Ice and Fire saga is pissing me off. George R.R. Martin, I wish I could quit you. Nothing seems to be happening and I am 390 pages in. People are kind of wandering around. I just can’t quit reading it though on the off chance something really cool happens and I miss it.

Speaking of Brokeback Mountain, when that movie came out I was living in a small town in western Oklahoma and working in a different small town. I went to go see it with two of my friends in the theater and I loved it. I was working at a movie rental/music store/ tanning salon in Clinton, Oklahoma. My boss ordered 20 copies of Brokeback Mountain for rental when it was released to DVD because he thought it was going to be that popular. He obviously had no idea what the movie was about. It was a fantastic movie, but not the kind of movie people in small town western Oklahoma are going to rent. I really wish I could have been there when my manager told my boss what the movie was about. Good Times.