Obviously not my new niece. She is way cuter.
Yesterday, my sister had my newest niece, Audrey.
I am madly in love.
I have five babies now, my sister’s three and Tina’s two, and I am still amazed by the power of emotions that I feel for them. There is this stunning, breathe taking moment when you first hold them and something inside of you expands, and from that point on everything about that little creature does is amazing.
Audrey has the world’s most perfect baby pinkie finger. I know that sound silly, but is tiny, pink, and perfect. I held her, and I knew there was another little person that I would lay down my life for.
I remember when my oldest nephew was a baby, and I thought there was no way I could never love another person as much as I love him. When my sister got pregnant with my eldest niece, I wondered how if I could possibly love her as much.
I think we start out with this idea in our heads that our love can be held in a measuring cup, and with each new person, we have to divide the same amount of love into two cups. Suddenly, instead of loving one a full cup, we have to love both with only a half a cup, and if we add more people to love, that same amount of love gets split further and further, and everyone has smaller bits of your love. Gracie taught me we get another cup, that is no smaller than the first cup, but often it is a completely different kind of cup.
With each new baby, I know loving more people makes you grow with everyone. They have taught me not to be afraid to love, because that love just adds and adds. Other things in life have taught me that sometimes love hurts, but I also know pain is a part of life and we live through it and move to something different, but not worse. So, I always want to add these cups to my life.
Seth is sweet, kind, empathetic, and funny in a sly sort of way.
I knew Grace would be different from Seth, I just didn’t know that she would be different from everyone else I had ever met. She is creative, funny, smart, and completely unique.
I don’t know who Audrey will be yet. I know she will be spectacular in her own way. I can’t wait to see what shape my love will take for her.
Geeks a Geeking