Insomnia and Butterflies

Today I went stepped out on my front porch to grab my mail and there was a butterfly on the mailbox. He flew off then came back in and landed on my shirt and shilled there for a moment. I am being stalked by butterflies. It is probably a good thing but definitely a strange thing.

This morning I finally fell asleep at about 5am, then I slept the kind poets write sonnets about. It was glorious. I had some really strange dream, two of which I remember with movie like clarity. One was just a strange my brain telling me what is stressing my subconscious dream and the other one was just strange. I think it needs to become a short story. I think after I write this blog post I am going to set up my laptop in the air conditioning and write it all down. It was weird. It had time travel, thought police, an apocalypse, nature going nuts, and seal pups. Oh and there was a Burger King. It is not like my normal back living in the dorms, forgetting to go to any of my classes then having to take a final dreams. It was just… bizarre.

So I haven’t been getting to sleep until early morning, if at all, lately. It is a summer thing, especially this unholy summer.  This means I spend a lot of time alone in my own head. It is a scary scary thing. I spend a lot of time having fake conversations with people in my head. One of the most common people is Ellen DeGeneres because she is my favorite talk show host. I have conversations with my friends and family. Sometimes I write things in my head and they stay there because I am too lazy to turn back on my computer. Generally when I wake up the next morning, I realize it is a good thing. I mean we nearly averted a spoken word poetry incident. Sometimes I create funny scenarios in my head or just follow ridiculous thought tracks until a winding twisting end. The common theme is that I know that they are amusing and I should get them down for posterity, or at least for the amusement of others, but whenever I try to remember ANY of it, it blinks away. It is like that speck floating in the pool, you try to grab it and it floats away and no matter what technique you try it still always gets away. Those are my late night conversations with myself. I do remember the less interesting things like this morning trying to remember the name of the creator of “Spawn” and only coming up with Todd. (I looked it up, no worries) I laid in bed thinking and wracking my brain trying to come up with it. I have no idea why that thought even came into my head.

So, now I know some of you are being all judgey in y0ur heads about me being so open about my middle of the night weirdness in my brain. Stop. I know you do it. Everyone on the face of the planet has fake conversations in their head. Most normal people do it to prepare for difficult conversation, I just happen to do it for sport. Here is a fantastic thing. Generally, most of your really strange shit that you do or think, most other people do too. That is the glorious thing about being a blogger is that not only do you write about your strange shit, but you know someone else out there has done the same thing.

I make sense to me.